A letter to my Seven year old self

Dear my Seven year old self,

I know you’re shocked and sad of whom I became.

I know you’re shocked how everything changed, and how life isn’t how you thought it would be.

I know everything turned to be the complete opposite.

...But what can I do?

I’m trying as much as I can to deal with life the way you wanted to deal with it when you grew up, but you know people aren’t as good as they were when they were kids.

People turned out to be worse than devils.

I’m sorry I break down sometimes, I know I promised you to be the strongest, but everything is so hard and nothing is easy anymore. I’m sorry I stopped feeling the love I felt towards everyone and started loving specific people and hating others.

Remember when mother once said life will totally change 10 years from now? Remember when I thought mother meant that life is going change to better, not to harder and worse?

I changed to a version I don’t like. I became worse, careless, messed up and broken. I mess up a lot subconsciously. I care way less than I should about my future and myself.

I gave permission for someone to love me and to let me love him, but instead, he broke me into pieces that I now fear love and getting into relationships. I now push away those who I feel may have feelings for me.

I changed, and i’m not satisfied with myself, Seven. I wish I can go back to you Seven, and enjoy my young innocent self.

Sincerely,

- Eighteen Year Old Self

#motivation #inspiration #sliceoflife #oldself #futureself